Beach Ready

Now that Easter is over, the commercials are telling us it’s time to get “beach ready.”  Then they want to sell us their gym membership/ laser hair removal/ body sculpting crap.  Want to know how I get beach ready?  The day after eating my fill of Cadbury Creme Eggs, I grab a couple of skirted bathing suits on the fly at Costco.  In an assortment of sizes.  Come home and try them on in the “comfort” of my own home.  Which means I can heave and squeeze and cajole my thighs into these bathing costumes in peace.  With the door locked.  Find the suit that covers the most/ pinches the least.  Return the rest.

That was surprisingly simple, and I’m out about 50 bucks and a small sprinkling of sweat.  C’mon, summer!  I’m ready.